I think it is all a part of growing up when you meet someone, when they are at a different point in their lives from yourself. This person could be looking into a serious commitment, just getting out of a relationship or even currently in one. When you manifest the type of person that you always wanted but they aren’t available to you whether it be emotionally or physically, how do you manage to cope with that? When I met (who I consider) One of the loves of my life, he was not single. And in spite of it all, I waited. I waited because I knew that in due time, it would be shown to me why the universe would allow me to manifest my dream guy and bring him into my reality state and I could not have him. I did at one point feel that it was a cosmic joke on me, because I did not understand the depths of how spiritually connected two individuals from different walks of life could be. I did not understand how you can finish a person’s thoughts and maybe even their minds from miles away.
Praying to a higher being will not bring a particular person to you, but instead a particular type of person. Someone who reflects your inner and outer being, what you give out into the universe. When I prayed and meditated on finding someone for myself, I asked for two things. I asked for my twin, not someone who looked like me, but someone who is like me. And I also asked for someone who would understand who I am as a woman. I asked for these two things because you have to provide yourself with what your soul really needs. To know what it is your soul needs, is to know yourself entirely. We will spend the rest of our lives with ourselves and that is plenty of time to learn what your soul desires most. When I spend time alone, I ask myself a series of questions about what I want and need in a man. I visualize my mind, my body, my soul and my spirits as four different types of plants. And just like a real plant that needs water, soil, and sunlight, your soul need love, peace, respect, honor and harmony. When you know what it is that your soul needs and you can find someone who gives you these things and more, I strongly believe that you have found your twin, your soul mate.
Your soul mate can walk into your life at any given moment and can appear in any form, a friend, a family member, or even a lover. A soul mate relationship is one of the deepest spiritual relationships, you will ever come to face and everyone experiences them. When you come across your soul mate, you will get a feeling of familiarity. A sense that you know this person from somewhere, and that there is a connection between you two that goes further than just meeting them. You know that this person will make big revelations in your life and you are happy that you have them.
When I met my love I was single. I was going to school, I haven’t dated in over a year at the time and I was not looking for anyone to date. I did not meet him in the most conventional way, so I pass off my feelings as a crush that would soon dissipate. After a year of ignoring the signs, pushing my feelings to the side, pretending that what I was feeling was nothing but a high school girl crush and even going as far as dating someone else, I realized that what I was feeling was real. It was legit. I have never felt a sense of love for someone at the magnitude that I did, who wasn’t family. When it was reciprocated back to me, I knew that this was something on a very high frequency level.
It took some time after realizing what I was feeling, to know what to expect next. I thought that my search was over, that the one that was made for me, has been found and I could have my “Happily Ever After” There was nothing online that could prepare me for what I had to deal with next and I felt alone. I had met someone who held such a big part of my heart and there was another person who felt the exact same way. I had to re-evaluate this situation in my head, over and over again for two additional years. I needed to play this story out from the beginning to see if there were signs that I missed or chose not to see. There weren’t any. Everything was as clear as a summery day, not a cloud in the sky. I asked myself, “Why would the universe allow me to manifest someone that was not available?” So I had to make a decision for myself that I could live with and I decided to remain friends and look for nothing deeper than that. By the later part of 2013, I had allowed myself to date again and I had met a guy who was in my life until June of the following year. I thought by pushing away my feelings (again) and appreciating what I was receiving from another man that maybe I could learn to accept what life was giving me. It didn’t work. I realized that as much as I had tried to push him away, it only made me want him more. Eventually, I learned that his relationship had ended, but it didn’t change the fact that things were more complicated than it has ever been.
The one thing you do not want to do when falling for your soul mate, is to lose yourself in the process. You may not even realize that this is happening, but the people around you do. It took me a long time to notice the pattern in my behavior was changing and with the help of friends and family, I got back on track. When I felt like I was losing him, I started losing myself instead. With all of the things that was going on around me, I didn’t want to lose control over something that I thought I had control over. My love life. But I later learned that I wasn’t losing him, but instead he was finding himself too. You can’t be good for your mate when you are not a whole person. And I had to go back and learn who Megan was all over again. I had to learn who I was as a woman, a mother, a sister, a daughter and a friend. I had to put those feelings on a back burner and just live life.
Soulmates know when they have found their other half, it’s such an overwhelming feeling of joy and completion. They may even feel that if they could live their lives, the way that they are feeling at that very moment, they would. If I had to redo anything in my life all over again, I wouldn’t. I would do the exact same thing over and over again. I am a passionate woman and I am a patient soul. I believe in happy endings and beautiful beginnings. I believe that there is a key to every lock and a “Hi” to every “Goodbye”. And if there is one thing that I have learned in the last five years is that when something feels right, when it feels organic, pure and honest, you would be lucky to ever experience that with more than once in a lifetime. Some relationships will never make sense to other people, until they have experienced it for themselves. And that is okay. Time reveals all truths and heal all wounds. “Where there is love, there is no question.”